Summary 

In this inspiring episode, I’m having a conversation with real client Dr. Hazel Abinsay, a busy pediatrician and mom of two who transformed her wellness journey with one simple mindset shift. From feeling like she was constantly “just trying to survive” to creating a sense of time freedom and losing 20 pounds in three months, Hazel’s story is a powerful testament to the impact of mindset, habit change, and coaching support.

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What You’ll Learn from this Episode:

• How Hazel broke free from the yo-yo dieting cycle and reclaimed her time as a busy mom and doctor.
• How she shifted from scrolling and snacking as stress relief to truly restorative self-care.
• The power of “magic action decisions” and time audits to structure your day for success.
• How to find a sustainable, enjoyable way to lose weight without deprivation—and without giving up your favorite foods.
• How to embrace imperfection, keep your foot on the gas, and transform your relationship with your health.

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Download the full transcript here.

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  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: Hey friends. Welcome back to the Burn Stress Lose Weight podcast. I'm your host, Dr. Priyanka Venugopal, I am incredibly excited to bring to you today's guest. This is my client, Dr. Hazel Abinsay. She's a physician out of Hawaii. We met at a conference a few months ago and one 10 minute conversation that we happened to just have casually over lunch really changed the trajectory of how Hazel was thinking about her weight loss and wellness journey. She was someone that was saying that she felt like she was just trying to catch up and stay on top of every single day. She felt like she had no time to take care of herself, but that one conversation started to have her challenge some of her most. Limiting beliefs that were really the reason that she was stuck on the scale. I cannot wait for you to listen to today's conversation with Hazel. She shares how she has lost 20 pounds and last three months without feeling deprived and how our work in this group and how coaching has really unlocked her feeling better. She said happier with her family, more present with her kids. She has so much more time now. As she's hitting goals, and if you love this conversation and you know that you want this work in your life, I really want to encourage you to apply to the upcoming cohort of the Unstoppable Group. You can get all of the details over at www.burnstressloseweight.com/group. I have all of the group details, the nuts, the bolts, the bells and whistles, all laid out for you on that page. There's a button that says Apply now answer a few questions so I can get to know you, and then we will set up a time to talk on a consult call and decide if working together in this group is going to be a best fit for you. So without further ado, let's get into my conversation with Dr. Hazel Abinsay. Hey, unstoppable friend you're listening to the Burn Stress Lose Weight podcast. I'm your host, Dr. Priyanka Venugopal, a physician turned a stress and weight loss coach for professional working moms and the founder of the Burn Stress, Lose Weight, Feel Unstoppable small group coaching program. This podcast is going to inspire change at the root for you on and off the scale. I have lost a little over 60 pounds while being a busy physician mom with two young kids and an unpredictable schedule. And along my journey, which was full of many, many imperfect moments. I have learned how to skip past the fads and the gimmicks. I am on this mission now to share with you how you can have a real strategy and mindset skills to really have more of the life you want that you have worked so hard for. Let's get into it. Hey friends. Welcome back to the podcast. Today I am joined by my lovely client. This is Dr. Habel Abinsay. Hazel, tell us about you and we're gonna get into, I have so many questions for you because I'm just obsessed with your story. I cannot wait to hear and have you share with us. So tell us about you and how we found each other.

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: Hi Pri thank you for having me. I am a full-time outpatient pediatrician here in Hawaii, and I first met Priyanka at a. Wealth conference in Honolulu in February, so that was about three months ago. And so I went into that conference really just really focused on money, learning how to be better about our finances, and then unexpectedly this wonderful relationship came out of it on the very first day, and that's where I first met.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: Love it. Yeah. It's so funny. You come in with one thing and you leave with something. Kind of unexpected, which we're, we're going to get into. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. So take us back to before. Mm-hmm. February. Tell me what was life like for you? You're a busy physician. You are, you know, taking care of patients and family and all the things that we do as busy professional women. Take us back to what life was like before February for you.

   

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: So I have two little boys. I have a 2-year-old and now a 7-year-old, and then I'm a full time pediatrician. So that was my two identities. Right mom and doctor, and I just felt like I didn't have any time besides those two. And so between those two, I just felt like I was always just rushing. I was just always trying to survive the day, and that's how I felt prior to this. I was like, I just need to get through the day. And so a lot of times people would try to ask me things about the future and I'm like, I have no idea what I'm doing tomorrow. You just, I just need to talk to, I only know what's happening today. And so it was a lot of me telling people like, I need you to text me again 'cause I'm not gonna remember this because I'm just so, I'm just trying to survive. And then in terms of my health. I've always been a yo-yo dieter. My weight has always fluctuated. For 20 plus years, I would get really good and really focused, lose a bunch of weight, and then once I was in a happy place, I my those habits, I lost them and then slowly would creep up again and then two, three years would go by. Four or five years would go by. Residency came by, then blew up again, and then I was like, then I did this. But when if situations, and then, so when I finished residency I said, okay, I'm gonna lose the weight again. So then after residency, lost the weight again. Diet year exercise. So residency finished in 2014. 2014. Okay, so 2014. Yeah, so I blew up AF in residency and then I exercised I diet. No, I just exercised and ate healthy, lost it.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: Okay.

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: Then I got pregnant 2017. Gained it. Yeah. Had the baby did this diet plan that helped me lose it. Then COVID happened, then gained it. So this was just my life. It was just a lot of yoing and I just could not maintain for the life of me. That was at the point when I met you that I was just, you know, I didn't even expect that I was gonna go into that money conference thinking that I would come out with, okay, let's focus on our health this year. So when I had met you, you had offered an alternative way to approach improving my life, my health, my lifestyle. I was like, you know what? I've tried so many different ways already and I couldn't get a handle on it. Let's just get help. I couldn't do it myself anymore, and so I'm just tired of going up and down. I was like, I can't do this forever. Yeah.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: So I'm kind of, there's a couple of things I'm curious about because you know when, and this is for anyone that's listening, when you've had a lot of experiences in the past, as I think we all have, myself included, where you've lost weight, but then you've gained it back and then you've tried something else, you lose weight and you gain it back. It's really normal if you have a lot of disbelief. Or if you feel like, you know what, maybe this is never really going to work for me and it can make us throw on the towel and not even try anymore. And like we kind of get stuck in that cycle. So what do you think it was that let you think that, you know what, this time I, it feels different and this feels different enough for me to overcome the disbelief that I might have in myself.

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: I definitely knew that I was in the obese range and that I needed to do something. Because blood pressure, cholesterol, my kids are young. The typical, like, I just wanna live long for my kids, right? But at this rate, I know it's not gonna happen. So I knew, I knew I needed to do something and I just didn't know what. Mm-hmm. Because I've tried so many things and the whole, okay, why don't you just eat the hard part when you're a doctor? It's like, you know what to do. You preach it every day, right? Eat healthier, walk 30 minutes, four or five times a week. It was like, it made me feel so frustrated in myself that I was telling my patients to do this all the time, but yet I couldn't figure out how to do it for myself. So when I had met you, I was in a place of desperation. For help. I just didn't know where I was gonna get it from and I needed help in a different way that I've never had before. 'cause I signed up for programs before and they helped, but again, I it gained, it came right back. But then what you offered was a mindset shift and it wasn't even focused on I know. I was like, we didn't even talk about, we didn't even talk about weight.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: We didn't talk about weight loss at all, actually. Yeah. Oh yeah, we did. We were sitting at lunch and you were talking about your time. Yes, yes, yes.

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: Right. And that's really, and I didn't realize how my time management was part of the bigger problem. That's right. And you just made me realize so much over that one lunch period for 10 minutes and then I'm Okay. So do you want me to just go back? Yeah. I want you to backtrack.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: I want everyone to really hear because, okay, Hazel, this is literally one of the number one thoughts that professional women have is about their time. And it makes sense because professional working moms really do have a lot on their plate. So if they have thoughts that they don't have enough time, it makes a lot of sense. But it was also the reason that was keeping you stuck. So yeah, tell us exactly what that story was.

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: Okay. So at the conference, one of the first topics that Bonnie Crew had set up was what? In your life do you wanna work on in 2025? So it's my family, it's my career, it's X, Y, Z, and I said my health. Right? And so that's what I journaled on on our book. And then when you, I think it was just meant to be that you were the coach that was set on our table that that day. And then over a lunch period, you had asked the question of, okay, so what was your goal that you had written down for 2025? And then I said, my health. And then you had said, okay, what's stopping you? And then I said, I just don't have time. I just don't have time to exercise, even though that's how much I want to. And she's like, well, there's only 24 hours in the day, Hazel. You can't fix that. But what is it about your time that's stopping you? Then I really thought about it, and then I said. My gut instinct was to say, my charting right? I spend so much time charting. And then you said, okay, so what can you do about that? And then my initial answer at that time was like, I could hire a scribe because I'm in private practice.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: Mm-hmm.

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: But after that. I went home and really reflected on your line of there's only 24 hours in a daily Hazel. What can you do to improve the way you use your time? And then I, I did a time audit without realizing what I was doing, without realizing about this. I was like, I, my, I was blown away when you did this. Yeah. But I didn't even realize what I was doing. But then I reflected on the way I was using my time and I realized how much time was actually. Scrolling on social media as my way of decompressing from the stresses of the day. That's what I was telling myself, right, is. So what I would do is I would wake up maybe around five 30. I would automatically pick up my phone, start scrolling social media, and then I would lose track of time and all of a sudden, oh my gosh, I have to get up. I have to get the kids ready. Boom, boom, boom, boom. I'm stressed, there's traffic, and now I'm starting the day off. Stressed, right? Mm-hmm. And then busy day. Then I would get home, and then I would sit in my car for 30 minutes before I go inside the house and be a mom.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: What were you doing the 30 minutes? What were you doing?

   

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: I would be scrolling, right? 'cause I was telling myself, right, I need to decompress. Right? I need to decompress from the day and this is my me time. Totally. But then I get into the house and now it's like, okay, I gotta feed the kids. I gotta clean the dishes, I gotta get the homework done. And then when the kids. Are in bed. Then what do I do again before I go to sleep? As I was scroll again, and then now my sleeping was late because you just lose track, track of time. So then I was sleeping later, and then in the middle of the night, sometimes I would wake up because my 2-year-old wakes up and then when he's finally down, I pick up my phone again and I'm scrolling just for a little bit. And so my sleep pattern was all off. I was not sleeping well. I was not utilizing my time well. And so after I did that time audit, I. I was like, oh my gosh. My scrolling, which I was using as my me time, right? My decompressing time. I worked so hard. I just need to do this for me was actually making my stress worse. Right? And then I was using scrolling as my stress reliever. It's a cycle.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: It's a really, and hazel, I was so glad because you came to our consult call having done that time audit. And I think that what was fascinating, and this is not just you, this is for anyone that really doesn't audit over what we are categorizing as me time and decompression, because all professional women need that. We need to have guilt-free rest, give our brains a real proper rest. When we're using snacking and scrolling as we've uncovered, you actually feel worse afterwards. You feel more tired. Your brain and your body feel worse. You have more regret. So how can it possibly be me time. If it's making you feel worse, which I think was such an important insight for you. Yes. So then what happened? So, and then what happened?

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: So I said, delete Instagram off my phone. I deleted social media. I, I came off social media and then I said, I need to be purposeful about the way I use my time. So then I've, residency has taught me to be like a checkboxy kind of girl, right? Mm-hmm. And so I downloaded an app where I now created structure in my day. Right. So every night it started with, let's just start with the next day. So I said, I'm gonna wake up at this time. I'm gonna wake up my kids at this time. I just planned out my whole day, right? This is magic. I said, I'm gonna leave the action structure decisions.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: Yes. Magic action structure, making decisions. So you repurposed the time that you were probably even less than what you were spending, scrolling on simply rehearsing the next day. Which is huge. Okay. It was amazing.

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: Yeah. It was amazing. Right? And it wasn't until I took your mini strategy class that I realized what I was doing and it made so much more sense. So what I was doing is I was taking all the decisions that I had to make the following day. I was doing them the night before in a setting where I wasn't stressed, where I wasn't pressured for time, and I could just make those choices already. So such simple decisions as. What are we gonna eat for breakfast, lunch, dinner, the order of my errands? What are the errands going to be? What am I gonna buy at that store? When we go there, what are the things that I need to make sure that are done tomorrow? And I put a specific place in my schedule. To get them done. Right. I didn't just say like, get them done at some point during the day. Like I said, we're gonna do it at this, at this hour. And so magically when I did that and I, and I, I like check boxing, so then you could just check it off the box. Yeah. Yes. And it just made me feel so much more accomplished.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: Mm-hmm.

   

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: At the end of the day. When everything that I had set myself to do, I actually did it. And so it was crazy how when that was done and I wasn't scrolling anymore, I was sleeping at the time, I said I was gonna sleep, I was waking up the time I said I was gonna wake up. I felt like I had more time. I. Hmm. And that was a magical feeling because I was more structured in my mornings. I wasn't stressed anymore in my mornings. I wasn't yelling at my kids. I wasn't fighting and mad at traffic. The kids were getting to school at a good hour, at a good time, and my day just started off so much less stress. And so that creating a structure in the day, and it sounds so simple, but I don't know why my brain. Couldn't have done this sooner .

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: Hazel, and it's so important that we know, because this is like a lot of what we talk about, you know, when we, when we talk in the group about doing the work is actually simple. Sometimes the concepts that you learn, like in our coaching calls, it's like, oh, it's actually something really simple. But the reason that we don't do those simple things is number one, we didn't know about them. But more important than that is because we are so attached to a story that is preventing us from seeing a simple truth. Like for you, it was, I don't have time. So while you believe I don't have time. You're not going to sit down the night before and make these decisions because you're holding onto the story of, I don't have time to do that. We have to bust that bubble first. Mm-hmm. To actually show you, oh, wait a second. Maybe I do have the time if I repurposed my time to actually create an opening for something that's simple like this.

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: Yes. And so it was magical. And then your, your words about magic action decisions the night before and making all those decisions. When you're not in a stress state, has relieved such a burden off my shoulders for whatever reason, because I just go through the day without thinking and that's what every people are like.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: I don't wanna think about this anymore. Mm-hmm. This is how you stop thinking about it. You make decisions and you don't leave them open-ended. It's magical. Yeah, it was great. So when you think about like number one, obviously like making some of these decisions the night before, doing that rehearsal in your mind for exactly when you're doing things and when you're not doing things, you're sharing that it lifted a burden and it created more time of course, and made you stop having to think about it. How was it an impact your dynamic in the family, with your kids, with your husband? Like how did it impact more than just waste for you?

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: Yeah. Okay. So one of the things my husband would tell me is like, you know. We would be at dinner. Dinner and then you would be on your phone at some point and I thought you were working. And then come to find out you were on social media. Mm-hmm. Or at night before bed. When the kids are winding down, I sound like I have such a addiction to social media.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: No, this is, this is all of us. This is not just you. Yeah. Right.

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: The kids are right there. And I would be on my, on my phone and then so all of that went away, so I just became so much more present at home. So much more present at home with my kids, with my husband, I was just more interactive with them. I'm yelling at my kids less in the morning. So I think they gained a happier mom, a happier spouse, a more present mom, and I felt so much more peaceful.

   

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: Mm. Do you feel like, what about the me time? Because you know, if we're used to using. I know 'cause I go down the Instagram rabbit hole all the time. Sometimes like, it's one of those things that can be so compelling. So if you are not doing that for your time to have your me time, or you're not snacking and randomly grazing on food for your me time, then what? How did you solve for that? Being able to give your brain a real break?

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: So one of the most interesting things when we had our first consult call when I had wanted to join you was you had asked me, what do you do for play? What is your you, what do you do for fun, just for you? You laughed at music and then you said, you actually, and you had to like dumb it down for me because you, I was like, what do you mean whatcha talking about? And she says, and you said, what are your hobbies, Hazel? Yeah. What are we doing for fun? Remember fun? What are we doing for fun? For, yeah, fun. And I was like, and then I, I cried because I was like, I don't have hobbies, I don't have time for that. And I didn't have anything in my daily life that was for me. Now things are different. My very first time I had met you and I said, I don't have time to exercise. I exercise. Now it's in my schedule. I, I exercise four or five times a week now. I go walks on, walks for hour, hour half. I'm in nature. Listen to music, listening to really uplifting podcasts. Mm-hmm. Things that are inspiring. You talk about these different buckets of play. What are the good ones? The negative ones, the neutral ones. I found that taking. Hot baths is a great way. Yeah. To decrease my stress level. So that's happening more. I'm still working on it. I'm trying to figure out what else I can do. But yeah, that's, so I'm definitely, yeah.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: I remember this part of the conversation because, and there's so many women, I'm like, so like, what do you do for fun? And it's like they look at me with this confused look on their face. Like, what exactly do you mean? Because. We're busy professional women, and I think sometimes you might have like a exer you might call exercise like, well, I exercise, but does that feel like play? Does it feel like you're actually getting the you time that you're wanting and deserving? Because most of the time I would say that that's a huge. Strategic gap that we don't know that we have.

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: I've never thought of exercise as like a fun Yeah. Like I don't consider that as a hobby. That's right. I'm not one of those. I'm not one of those, but I've learned how to make it fun for me. Yeah. And so I walk, but then I'm also listening to other people's experiences. Mm-hmm. So podcasting is one of those things I just never have the time to listen to. But then with these one hour walks, I listen to now at the end of a walk I'm like, wow, that was really inspirational. Plus I got to exercise.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: It's like, you know when you start to surround yourself with messaging that is. Not just like rah rah, cheerleader positive, but like really strategically, how are we going to improve our health, our wealth, our wellness? Mm-hmm. You start to create more of that because that's what's coming into your brain, which is what I really love about coaching. Yes. Yeah, absolutely. So when we first met in February, from, remind me if I'm wrong. I think that you got access to the group early. You got access to the curriculum and the videos and like the material. What did you feel coming into the group having gotten earlier access to it? Like do you feel like you already started creating wins and seeing, you know, the scale come down and feeling better? And then what was the shift that HA started to happen for you once we actually started coaching?

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: Once I started listening to your first, your mini, your mini strategy class, right? So your mini strategy class was one of the first audio one hour classes that you taught. I've actually listened to it multiple times. Yeah, because I feel like. You cover a lot of topics that I feel like I need to hear it over and over again. And so things that you talked about in that one class was things like listening to your body, hunger cues, allowing yourself to feel the discomfort of being hungry. And that's okay because your body will just use your natural, basically you're fat.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: Yeah.

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: Right. Go dine in. And so it's okay if you happen to get to hungry. Go D in will dine in. Yes. Right. So, and then, so. I think residency has taught us to like eat when you can. You might not be hungry now, but you have to eat when there's those windows. But then you're, you taught me on that videos like, you don't have to eat if you're not hungry. Listen to your body because. You allow yourself to be hungry, allow yourself to feel a little uncomfortable. That's okay. Mm-hmm. As long as you tell yourself that when you can, when the time comes, you will eat. Yeah. So simple. But I was like, yeah, why do I keep eating when I'm not hungry? When I know I'm gonna be able to eat in like a couple hours. So then that was one of the things that I had to start doing is, is allowing, is waiting to eat. And so then you also talk about intermittent fasting as a way. And so my husband used to do intermittent fasting and his window was from 12 to eight. Mm-hmm. And so I tried it once and I was a couple of times and I was like, I can't, I have to eat breakfast. So I said I can't do intermittent fasting. But there was something that you said where go with the flow. Nothing's perfect. It doesn't have to be so strict. And so I was like, why don't I shift? My hours to be like eight to five. Mm-hmm. Because I can, I need to eat breakfast, but I don't need to eat dinner so much. And so I shifted. And so when I did that, like amazing improvements in my weight loss. So I intermittent fasted. But I shifted the schedule that I thought it had to be this way. And then you even said, it doesn't have to be eight hours. Yeah. Where you window.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: I think that that is actually a big piece of that strategy mini class, and even the way that I talk about intermittent fasting right now, because I think that there are some people that can take intermittent fasting and overuse it, and when you overuse it, then you end up undereating and then that can slow your metabolism down in the long run. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. But when we use intermittent fasting, like a really savvy tool, which is I'm going to eat. I'm also going to give my body a break from eating. Like I'm just not going to be grazing 24 7. I'm going to eat enough nutrition in the intermittent fasting window. You will just amp up your ability to access fat, burn, burn, right? Actually burn fat. Which I think is really, really impactful.

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: Right. And I think intermittent fasting coupled with magic action decisions the night before. Made the process so much easier for me where I said, okay, this is what I'm going to eat at eight 30, at 12 at whatever. Whenever the hunger cue comes in, this is what I'm gonna, this is what I'm going to eat. Because I some people, when they don't, when they intermittent fast and there's no plan for what they're gonna do during that time, they just. Go to town, whatever is available, and then they overeat. And so that, I feel like combination of that too was really effective for me. And that was even before the program started, I think. It was just listening to your Yeah, just that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is before we even started actually active coaching, so things like that. It was just these little small tweaks in my daily habits that I implemented listening to your call that I saw was really helping my metabolism, right. My weight loss. Yeah.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: So what do you think it was since we started coaching and you started experiencing coaching? Like actually not just like what you hear on a podcast, not passively consuming a video, which is very different than like you actually experiencing real time coaching. What do you think has been your experience of that and what's been your takeaways?

   

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: So, so I really appreciate you Priyanka for our, our coaching call two weeks ago when we talked about time, but then somehow it, what also came out of it was. What did I do wrong in the past? Yo-yos? Like where did you go wrong? What happened when you were starting to see yourself go up? Mm-hmm. And so my problem's always been maintenance, right? And so one of the things that came up discussion was like, I'm just afraid with coaching that I'm gonna lose the weight and then I'm gonna just gain it back again. Yeah. Like how, how, how is this different? Yes. From all the other. Plans, diets I've tried in the past. Very good question. Right? Yeah. And so what you helped me come to realize at that point? Oh, you asked me.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: That's right. I was like, okay, let's let, let's coach on this. Let's go there. Right? Such an, this is anyone listening, which is okay, you know, I can do a coaching program and I will lose weight, but what if I gain it back? Mm-hmm. And it's not, what if you will gain, that's how our bodies are, right? You're gonna gain a few pounds, but like. What happens then? That was what I asked you. Mm-hmm. Okay. So then what happened?

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: Right? Right. So then you had drawn this curve like, okay, you are losing the weight and then your weight's picking up again. And then you had asked me, when you see yourself picking up again, what happens right there to you, Hazel? Like, what are you thinking at that point? And so that is something that I've never reflected on. I've never asked myself that question. I just said, once I see myself gaining the weight, I'm like, oh, here it goes again. I'm gonna just gain again, this is just the cycle of my body, right? And so. Now you're really, you are really asking me to be very mindful and thoughtful and reflective on that moment when I see myself starting to gain again. And so it was that mindset of like, I'm just failing again, and I just let go. It is like, this is just what I do. I was using my body as my reason for why I gained the weight back, but really it's mind, right? Mm-hmm. And I, and one of the things that you made me help me realize was that I hated the process of all the other times I had lost weight. I was depriving myself. I was on these different diets where I was eating packets. Artificial packets. And I was only eating one meal a day, or I was really calorie restricting. And I didn't love the process. I mean, they worked.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: They worked, but they didn't last because Yeah, you didn't love it.

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: And so when I saw myself gaining again, I was at the mindset, I don't wanna do that again. I don't wanna put my body and my myself through it. It was, it was not a happy person. So instead of going back to the plans that I didn't love. I gained it back. That's what helped me at that point. When you told me like, what happens here, it's me telling myself I didn't like what I went through. Mm-hmm. I didn't like the process of how I got to my weight loss, and I don't wanna do that again. And so. What's happening with your coaching is you have always emphasized you need to love your process. You need to love what you're going through. And it's taken me, and it's taken a couple other women in our cohort to, we've asked you so many times like, what do you mean by love our process? Yeah. What do you, what are you talking about? So now I've come to realize that I'm still eating what I love during this weight loss. I still get to enjoy, so like for Mother's Day, we still went to my favorite restaurant 'cause that's where I wanted to go. I still eat the slice of like, or the piece of cake. I still take a bite of the ice cream. Things I would never have done on previous plans.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: Mm-hmm.

   

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: But now I have a stronger willpower and mindset. To be like, okay, I just need a small amount. I don't need to eat the whole thing. Right, right. And because I'm not depriving myself anymore. Yes. The weight loss is a lot slower. Mm-hmm. Than my previous plans. Mm-hmm. But I'm not hating myself. Right. I'm not angry and bitter that I'm so calorie deprived every day.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: No, I think it's interesting, we, I think we might have talked about this a few weeks ago during our coaching call where I talked about how to guarantee your weight loss results. And we were talking about, you know, if you have a goal for the week, what is your guaranteed strategy to hit it? So if you want to lose two to three pounds per week, we can do that. You can create a strategy that will guarantee your results, but will you love that? Strategy. Well, you love that plant. It's almost like Goldilocks, a little bit. We have to find this Goldilocks way of eating where we are for the most part, primarily eating high quality, nutritious foods with protein and fiber and vegetables. And also it's like we have to ask ourselves if I want to enjoy. Dessert on date night, or if I want to enjoy something with my family on a Saturday evening, how would I eat those foods in a way that guarantee my results? And I think that it's like pushes us to really be more, more mindful and come up with those magic action decisions. Mm-hmm. Of this is exactly how I can have, it's like having my cake and eating it too. It's like getting ourselves and that listen, that like my favorite example is with the kids. Like, I can love my kids. I don't like them all the time. So even with a weight loss strategy, we have to love our strategy. That doesn't mean that it's always gonna be easy, that it's always rainbows and daisies. Like sometimes that means saying no to something and letting it be totally okay. What do you think about that? Mm-hmm.

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: I think that's what makes this different from everything else I've done in the past, is you're not telling me what to eat, how much to eat, when to eat, how much water to consume. You're not telling me Yeah, what I need to do to lose weight and the, and that's. I used to think I needed Yeah. In order to lose weight. I, when I first met you, I said, I need you to just tell me what to do.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: I know, well, we do kind of do that in the strategy mini class, but we, it's like so much more than that. Right.

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: And it's not, it's a different, it's a different way. Right. I remember you saying, but now it's, you're telling me the fundamentals of what my choices. Should be based on, and I'm still making the choices of what my plan looks like, right? So my choice to exercise is, you, you all you say is just you need to move. Mm-hmm. Right? That's what you say. Mm-hmm. And so I've chosen to make walking my, my habit. You, you encourage the 10,000 steps, but then I don't. Get it every day, but I, I try. Mm-hmm. But then with the, the eating part, I still get to choose what foods I eat every day. You're not telling me you need to eat chicken breasts, you need to eat like a cup of cauliflower. You're not telling me that, but you know that we know. Yeah. Right. You know that we know what's healthy for us. So you're giving us the space to make those decisions for ourselves, catered to what we love. And so that's what I do. And so I eat the foods that I love every day. I know to. It's all portion control for me, which I've never had before, what I used to have, but off plan I would just like go to town, but now I do it. I used to drink Starbucks every day. Mm-hmm. That was part of my, I deserved it. Yeah.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: What were you, what were you getting at Starbucks?

   

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: Oh my gosh. You're gonna, you're gonna laugh. Chai latte. I, that was yours? Yeah, because I had this mindset. Oh, it's, it's not a mocha frappucino or anything. So then I got rid of that because it. I knew that it was high sugar 'cause it tasted so good. But then my mind was like, oh, but you deserve this. But then it was just like.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: I think that's so important. Hazel, can you speak to that? Because like, you know, when you're a professional working mom and you're working really hard, it's really a very compelling story to tell yourself that you deserve. Fill in the blank. You deserve this treat. You deserve this snack. You deserve this scrolling time. You deserve off time from your family. How is what you have been doing in the last multiple months now Really been what you deserve? I feel like, you know, 'cause we can talk about what we deserve and we fill it with snacks and sugar, but like what is it that you think has bridged that gap for you?

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: I feel like it's the immediate dopamine rush, the way that you describe it, sense of. Reward. Mm-hmm. Versus really Hazel. What are you trying to achieve in your life? What do you want? What's the end goal for you? Bigger picture here, it's those little Starbucks that's preventing you from getting off your blood pressure meds, your cholesterol meds, predisposing you to diabetes with all that sugar, is that daily Starbucks really worth possibly dying early and not being with your kids, but you always say, mm-hmm. I wanna live long for my kids. I always say that, but what am I actually doing to make that happen for myself? And so now I found other ways to reward myself, right? So, I mean, I don't know if people actually think listening to inspirational podcasts before rewarding yourself, but it's self-help. It makes me feel better. It's a different dopamine, I guess.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: Totally.

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: Where I feel inspired. Right. And so listening to inspirational podcasts, getting outside, being under the sun, seeing nature, those are the kind of things right now channel Yeah, my me time. And so I like to think those are positive.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: We've talked on, we, you know, inside the group we talked about the three bucket system and you know, there are some buckets like the negative bucket, which is over scrolling, overeating over drinking has a negative net outcome. It still will create dopamine and endorphins and it feels good and it gives you a break. But a net negative, and I think what you're talking about, which I just really want people to hear, is that we can have net neutral and net positive buckets at also give us a break that also really are a way to treat yourself. You might not get a hundred x dopamine endorphins the way that you would with sugar and snacking and scrolling, but you are gonna get some dopamine endorphins with positive results on the other side. Correct.

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: And to me, that's just the cleanest pleasure ever. But even bigger than that is the fact that I got rid of the negative bucket things. Yeah. And I don't feel junky because I loaded myself on sugar with Starbucks. Mm-hmm. Unless grouchy around my kids because I slept better. Those are so much more valuable to me. Yeah. And hearing my husband tell me, you know, you're just a lot happier now and you're a lot more present now with the kids. I mean, that is invaluable to me. And so it's okay. I don't need those things.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: Yeah. Anymore. Yeah. And yeah, I think it's, it's such a ride when we get to really marinate in what those good like. Priceless results are, and it's not that you like, and again, this is so important because we go into this land of all or nothing. Like I can never have sugar and I can never have a snack. Like that's not what we're talking about, right? What we're talking about is having more discernment and treating our body and our brain with so much more care and regard that we are mindful of how we eat those things. So we don't feel like trash afterwards. So we don't sabotage our brain, so we don't sabotage our, like that is exactly what we're talking about. It's not all or nothing, but how do you want to eat these things and also feel good at the same time? It's like the win-wins.

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: So I think that's where I am now in my journey with you, is that now I'm starting to figure out how to incorporate a little bit of the negative stuff into a positive way or more controlled. I think that's what I'm gaining from this experience is I'm just a lot more aware. So things like Starbucks, right. I, like I said, no, I didn't drink Starbucks for two months. And then now it's like, okay, Starbucks. Tall, not venti. And it's, it's sugar-free vanilla latte, which gives me the, still the same sense of like, you know, that same, but then it's so much more controlled now and it's not every day. Right. You know? Yeah.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: This is, that's real life. And this is, again, I know last week's coaching all we were talking about, like learning how to fall in love with the process because it creates intrinsic motivation and habits that stick longer. But part of what you're talking about is you really want to fold in enjoying. Vanilla latte every now and then enjoying the like. You wanna know how, teach yourself how to do that while also hating goals, which that's like real life, how you keep it on for a lifetime. Yes. Which is so good. Yes. So, you know, you've been talking about like the presence you're having with your family and getting out of the decision fatigue. How do you feel like, you know, we met back in February, we're in May now. How do you feel your weight loss results? Have transpired just by doing this work.

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: The weight loss has been great. So then just to be absolute about it, so ever since end of February till now, it's the end of May. It's been 20 pounds down and definitely slower than the other programs that I've done. So it's been. March, April, may. Right. So three months, 20 pounds, which sounds pretty impressive.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: I know. I'm like, you're saying that slow. I'm like, is it really slow? Like what? What's happening? Yeah, I know, I know. I usually wonder with some of these other weight loss, again, I can't say that I know, but every single weight loss strategy out there, but half the time I'm like, are you just losing water weight? When somebody says that they lost like, you know, pounds and pounds in a week, I'm like, that was inflammation. That was water weight. That was not fat loss. Right. And what I'm more interested in my clients is that you have fat loss while you maintain your muscle mass. I don't know about you. That's just my thoughts about it. Like that's impressive.

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: I think that's where I am now. Yeah. Where I think the first, like maybe eight, 10 pounds was, it came down pretty quickly, which is what you expect. I've gone through this so many times, right? Like yes, I lost that pretty quickly in the first couple months, but then after the first 10 pounds, which is another 10 pounds, it's probably taken me two months, and then I think now that I'm working out more mm-hmm. I probably am gaining muscle too. So the weight dropping is not as fast as it used to be. Mm-hmm. Which for some women I can. C they're getting frustrated with that.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: This is the, the, that it screw it moment and like giving it Totally giving it up, right? Yeah.

   

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: Right. Like, and, and working so hard and I'm seeing no results. Mm-hmm. But I think that's one of the things that you coach on so well, right? Mm-hmm. You talk so many women, we, we, we'd ask you.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: That's the biggest one for, I think overachievers we have a really very harsh and critical lens in, and we get very frustrated and impatient when we don't see quick wins every single week. And I'm like, we need more than popcorn brain. Like the quick, like quick hits and quick pleasure. I'm like, let's keep your foot on the gas. Just trust me. Keep your foot on the gas. Most people, when they feel like the results are slowing down or getting slow, they make the mistake of jumping ship. They take, make the mistake of taking their foot off the gas and that's what it's like. We don't give it enough time. To really create that momentum.

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: I think recently you've been coaching a lot about that. Yeah. To a lot of us. About how when you're, when you have off moments mm-hmm. When you see the week where you, you set back. Where you gained. Instead of loss. Yeah. Lose. Right. And so you've been talking to a lot to us about how you cannot take those moments and let it be the moment that's gonna just make you I can't do this anymore. Yeah. You just have to pick right back up and keep going with the plan and don't give up. And, and as much as I say this to myself, you, you always, you always say like, imagine what you would tell your child is something that you say. I know, and I'm like, yeah, you're absolutely right. We would be totally telling our children, you know, you are not gonna always be perfect. You're gonna have moments where it's not gonna work out the way you want, but it doesn't stop you. You keep going and you're gonna get better at this and whatnot. I'm like, I.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: Yes, you have to stick with it because Hazel, there's something very vulnerable. Again, especially for smart overachieving women to stick with it when they feel like they've been imperfect. It's very vulnerable to do that. It's like you kind of feel like you're putting yourself out there and there's some, maybe some embarrassment or some shame or some judgment, and because we wanna hide from that feeling, we take our foot off the gas, we go and hide like we monkey emoji. We don't weigh in, we don't come to coaching calls. We stop engaging. That is what I love coaching on because when we can learn how to treat ourselves with more regard and have the care to hold our vulnerable moments and the imperfection, keeping your foot on the gas, to me, that's when you skyrocket results like on the scale. And also, I mean, we coach a lot on non-food, non-weight loss things in the group too.

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: So now that you said that our first call ever, you also. Talked about stress. Mm-hmm. And then I thought I was going into this program just to talk about weight. And then you said, but Hazel, so much about stress is what triggers your weight. So we have to address. It's the stress part. And so what's so different about this program is that all of us, all the women in the group are bringing in our stress in life to you, which I feel like is a lot for you, but you're helping us through these difficult life moments because you understand that these are the moments that lead to snacking, scrolling, drinking the alcohol, and if we don't figure out how to go through these experiences in a way that we're very mindful of what the effects are on your body and your habits. Then we're never gonna get anywhere in the long run.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: Yeah.

   

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: Right. And so that's completely different from any other program, right. Is everyday life, everyday stressors in your work, in your family? Anything we bring to you? It's not even weight related at all.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: It's so, I know relationships like, wait, oh, we're gonna be talking about food. And I'm like maybe for one or two calls or like maybe here and there. We do talk about of course, like going off plan or whatnot, but we are spending most of our time getting coached on our real life on what are the stresses that we're having around time productivity, around our kids around. Because when we understand the thoughts we are having about our life, we can un, we can, we can completely change our entire perspective and get so much more control back.

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: Correct. So this is ended up being so much bigger than what I thought it was going to be.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: Yeah. When you came to the conference and you came for money. Right. You came to the Wealth and Wellness Conference because you wanted, obviously like money was important to you, and investing in this group is a serious investment. So talk us through how you made the decision to invest financially in yourself. What you thought about it, what led you to be able to just decide this was aplu something you were going to do, even though it was a serious investment.

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: So I've never heard about, I, I've heard about coaching. I've never known anything about it. I didn't know it was a mindset. It was a really focused on mindset. My world of exposure to coaching first happened at that conference mm-hmm. Where I was meeting all these fabulous women who Yeah. Physician women were also coaches in, in your own different fields. Right, right. And so I was like, what is this coaching? And then so. We would Google, each of you, we would Google all the different coaches and then we would see how much your courses are. Yeah. And then honestly, the first initial shock was like, wow, that's a lot. Yeah, that's a lot. And like that's a big investment. And then it took me a while to come to the conclusion of. You know what, Hazel, nothing else has worked for you, nothing else has worked for you. All the other things that you've tried also cost money and look where you are now. And so that was part of my worry was. Is this gonna be a big investment that I'm just gonna fail again? But then I had to, I, I knew I had to do something for myself and I knew I had to do something different. And this obviously was very different. Mm-hmm. And I loved how you changed my mindset in 10 minutes over lunch. That was my first time. Being coached without even realizing being coached me. And I think, yeah. And so I said, you know, if Priyanka can change and improve my life in 10 minutes, how much more so over the course of six months? And so I was like, I am in, I just need to be in the space with people that I know are going to be more knowledgeable than me. Mm-hmm. Can really help me like figure out what my issues are. Which you have, which you did like, 'cause you have so many, you have. How many women in the cohort, but you still are able to like give us one-on-one attention and I love that. Yeah. And so I think meeting you and inve and trusting that you are going to help me get to my goals and reach my goal of maintenance. And make this a lifelong thing. Yeah. Is probably the biggest jump and leap of faith I had to take with investing with you. And I know the weight loss is slower, but I know I'm building habits and that's the habits that's gonna take me to the end goal where I wanna be. Mm-hmm. And no more yo-yoing. That's my, that's my goal.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: Yeah. Yeah, it's, it's like, you know, I feel like in the group, I think about this as like a really beautiful mix where you do get a lot of personal, like we follow your coaching thread, whether it's live on our call or inside the written coaching cafe, where we really follow your thread all the way through. And also you have the benefit of learning from other women. So what do you think about the group coaching dynamic and being in a group with other. Women. Is there anything that felt scary about that or vulnerable about that? Or have you just loved it for, for every minute? Like what was your experience of that as a doctor?

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: We were supposed to know everything. We're supposed to be the one that everyone looks to for reassurance and guidance, and so we're only allowed to be vulnerable with certain people, our close friends, our close family. I. But when it comes to this struggle with weight loss, right? Not everyone in your family can help you through that the way you need it. And there's things you wanna say that, and I told you when I first met you, I was like me talking about my weight loss, I feel. This is important. Why does my weight loss journey matter? Like I felt so small compared to other people's problems.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: Right? Like this is not a big deal compared to the real problems that people have.

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: Correct? Right. And so I felt like I couldn't talk to people about my struggles with my weight loss because there is so much bigger problems going on in the world. That I just, I, it felt uncomfortable and. It just didn't feel right. Yeah. For me. But then to be in a space where all of these amazing, strong, powerful women are all allowed to be vulnerable together with no judgment, with nothing but love and support. I'm such a big believer in community and this community is so special, and I think that's part of the success that we're all gonna have together.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: Yeah.

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: Right. Because then we learn from each other. We that feeling of. Oh, it's also that feeling of isolation, right? And so now I'm not isolated anymore. Other women are struggling with me, so yeah, it's great. I love that,

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: Hazel. Thanks for sharing. If someone was considering joining the group, maybe they've been thinking about it for a while. They've been listening to the podcast and they try to take from the podcast and they try to implement it by themselves, but they know that coaching would be a great asset for them, but they're on the fence. Mm-hmm. What would you say to that person?

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: I think. Coaching with Priyanka is unlike any other experience that you'll probably ever have with your weight loss journey and more just your life. You're gonna receive a lot more than you expect, and so I'm super thankful. I decided to join your program and it's a process. It's a thing, it's, it's not, here's a agenda that you need to fill every day. Here's your recipe for weight loss. It's really just like. We're changing your identity.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: This is, I think we talked about this last week. It's like there's an evolution of your identity. I could give you, and like I know people do, you get like a PDF with 10 macros of this and 30 macros of this and like we can give you a checklist, but there's something about that that falls flat when we cannot take it into our real life. When we're having struggles and we're having travel, when we're with our busy kids and stresses at work, we have to do this deeper work of evolving our identity and catching our stories, catching those like little sneaky things that our brain comes up with to take us off track. How do we redirect our brain like to those high currency thoughts to, I think unlock what I really want for more women is to feel their best inside out. And I think that that's, that's kind of my mission, what I want for everybody in the group.

   

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: Yes, absolutely. I think you're helping us build the skills. That will help us make good, smart decisions with our health in whatever situation with maybe wedding vacation. Mm-hmm. Whatever those moments where you tend to fall off.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: Yeah. And then to practice fall in like, this is the best teacher, let's fall off and now let's figure out exactly how you were gonna, that's the beauty of it. And I love it because now we get to teach the next generation how to do that, which is amazing. We're not perfect.

  Dr. Hazel Abinsay: Right? We're not perfect. And as a, as a women physician, that was, that's something that a lot of us struggle to say. It's, you know, we're not gonna always have it. Right. And this is one of those things, which is so good. Oh, oh God, Hazel. We're always striving. We're striving and we're ultimately, we're always doing this for our family, for those that we love to be. I wanna live long. I wanna travel the world. I wanna be with my husband for a long time. I wanna see my kids grow up and have families, but that reality is only gonna happen if I make those decisions today and, and I need it to be sustainable. That's my journey. And so I think this method is probably the most effective way of making that happen compared to everything else I've tried so far.

  Dr. Priyanka Venugopal: Hmm. Thanks Hazel. Yeah. I'm so glad that you came on the podcast. I, I know. I was like, we're gonna talk for about 30 minutes and then here we are, an hour later chatting. Is it an hour already? So grateful for you to come and share your story and your real. Journey. I know that it's not always easy to share, but I think that there's something deeply empowering when we own our whole story, when we own those ups and the downs, and I hope that somebody listening to this feels a little bit more inspired just by this conversation. So thank you so much, Hazel, for coming on the podcast. Thanks everyone for listening, and we will see you next week. Thank you. I hope you enjoy today's conversation with Hazel and if her story resonates with you, if you can tell that coaching, making magic action decisions, understanding how to have a plan and stick with it without deprivation and creating more time. Enjoy in your life. It's something you want. I want to encourage you to stop waiting. Doors to the upcoming cohort of the Unstoppable Group are now open. I strongly encourage you to take a few minutes, head over to burnstressloseweight.com/group where you can read all about the program, the nuts, the bolts, the details. You can really get an understanding of what it's like to work with me in this six month program. We have live group coaching calls, daily written support. You have the best combination, in my opinion of personal coaching and mentorship, and at the same time, you get to learn from the coaching and the obstacles of other smart professional women, which to me is priceless. So if you want this, don't wait another minute. Head over to burnstressloseweight.com/group and hit the Apply Now button. Tell me a little bit about you so I get to know you, and then we will set up a time to talk on a consult call or we can text each other back and forth and decide if this is the right fit for you. I cannot wait to see you on a call, and I hope you'll have an amazing day. Bye. Thanks for spending this time with me on the Burn Stress, Lose Weight podcast today. I hope that you are leaving today's podcast episode feeling a little lighter and more inspired than when we started. It turns out. That you don't need to have a stress-free life to hit your goals on and off the scale, but when you feel more empowered to respond to your real life stresses, with true strategy, we will game change how we show up, and how we hit our goals. If you wanna take what you are learning here on the podcast and put it into real life implementation, it might be time for us to work together in the Burn Stress, Lose Weight, Feel Unstoppable Group coaching program. Head over to burnstressloseweight.com/group and you can learn all of the details, the nuts, the bolts, when the next group is starting and exactly how you can join. Okay, friend, I'll see you next time